The Bad Roommate

The Bad Roommate

It's been a while. Welcome back.

       Some beardy bastard comes to the school to scout out the school for talent so Andre and Tori


[Edit 11/09/2019: The above is all I had written for this episode in June of 2017 before inexplicably leaving and never writing in this blog again. I absolutely refuse to finish it. It just seems funnier this way.]

Robbie Sells Rex

Robbie Sells Rex

 You know, I think Andre might be the protagonist of this show. I'm really starting to consider that he's the best character. While other characters may be generally consistent (Jade) or have frequent high points (Cat, Robbie), Andre is just always in his own world doing his thing. He's got a consistent character that's funny without being unrealistic or having a specific wacky aspect to cling to.

                 anyway. This episode isn't about Andre at all.

  So some music producer comes to the school to give a half assed speech to 20 kids, but while he's there he says "Ay robbie how about you come to my house and be sure to bring your puppet that hasn't been in the show for seven episodes". So Robbie does this, and he also brings Cat and straightens his hair. Let me just interject here to say that Matt Bennett has been hitting the gym lately you can tell. Bet you thought I woulden't notice matt- but I did. 

so the guy has this kid. And the kid is like an asshole or something. It's weird that a show about clearly wealthy teens still paints rich people as assholes, but who am I to judge. So this asshole kid is like "look I really like your puppet I'll pay you two grand for it" and Robbie is like "ya I'll think about it" and panics. 

            so this show manages to read my mind again. Tori says "I think Robbie should sell it, It's not normal for him to be dependent on it" and Jade immediately calls her shit by questioning why she revived the 'dead' Rex in season 1 or two or whatever.  So Rex (the puppet who is connected to Robbie) convinces Robbie to sell.. himself (Rex). So Robbie gets two grand and the asshole kids new puppet (Voiced by Dan Schneider in a way that makes me uncomfortable in a way that he didn't intend it to), but he goes crazy or something? It's just a really stupid scene. He starts hearing Rex and can't sleep and generally goes absolutely bonkers over the loss of his puppet, I dunno. It's just kind of dumb and way too over the top. It comes off less funny than it should just because it paints Robbie as having a very legitimately troubled mental state.

 oh hey here's one of the B plots. Sikowitz has some other asshole kid (a girl who is his neighbor) who keeps throwing eggs and assaulting him. He calls the police on her and the mother tries to apologize so her daughter doesn't get taken to Juvie, but hold on

So they take this girl and have her hook up with the other 12 year old, and the asshole boy 12 year old immediately stops caring about Rex and fucks this girl. I don't know what they would have done if he just didn't give up the puppet? Why would they assume he would not care at all about it anymore? Who cares. Robbie gets Rex back and there's a joke that alludes to Rex and Robbie having a romantic relationship. It is as odd as you would expect a subplot about a 17 year old fucking a puppet in a children's show to be. 

Okay hey here's the real B-plot. There's a mysterous masked and costumed man going around Hollywood Arts throwing flour in people's faces. The gang who isn't involved in the A-plot strives to track him down (in particular Jade) and generally it involves a lot of people getting hit with flour. At the very end of the episode Cat tackles him after the rest of the game corners him. They remove his mask and find that it's just an incredibly casual guy from another school who throws flour at people just because he's kind of bored. But he's not an asshole about it. Everyone shrugs and says variations of "well.. alright then." and they casually go off walking in their own ways- the flour thrower going unpunished and everyone else being vaguely let down with the incredibly benign outcome. It's actually probably one of the best B-plots inthe show, and it's got such a good ending to it. The flour bomber seems like as much of a real person as anyone else in the group.. they just don't really know him. It's funny, and subverts the shows over the top nature.

It's a good episode, everyone has something to do, and a lot gets done in the shows short timeframe. Robbie's freakout is the low point of the episode, but other than that it's very consistently good. I'll give it an 8/10

Side Notes:

• Bibble (Cat's snack) is brought up again. I say again, because apparently it's in one of the TV movies I didn't watch.
• Here's some British 10 year old's review of the episode I got from the Victorious Wiki: one of the worst epi come on robbie should have sold rex for g also the fact that he got another stupid puppet sucks i mean come on robbie needs to undersatand that puppet are not human and needs to grow up its a bleeding dumb pupett how can u miss a dull so stupid this episode is getting a 0 rating y make another episode about this stupid crap unreasitic annoying vdumming no wonder some ppl may this robbie anyways thtas my review tommy boy out peace im never watching this crap episode again

One Thousand Berry Balls

One Thousand Berry Balls

   The A-Plot of this is garbage. Or maybe it's the B-plot. It's not really clear. The berry balls one. It's bad.

                   also, hey remember in season 2 when it seemed like a pretty big piece of worldbuilding where Tori is shocked that Hollywood Arts doesn't have a prom and everyone else replies it's just no big deal? Yeah, probably because they have fifty other dances during the year. There are like three a season.

  Alright so Tori is strapped for cash. I'm not really sure if Hollywood Arts is supposed to be a private school the students pay for or not, but whatever. Andre asks her what she needs money for anyway, and she gives the response "yunno clothes and makeup and stuff". She could have just said "yunno to move the plot along" and it would have the same impact. Andre hooks her up with a job and literally all she has to do is hand out free samples to get $100 in a single shift, but she isn't nearly charismatic enough to do this so she ends up putting all the free samples (of frozen yogurt mind you) inside of her hat. Not in the trash or a local plant or anything, just on top of her own damn head. They end up melting all over her, but I guess the boss is a dumbass because she quickly explains "It's just my makeup running!" and he pays her. I mean honestly this plot would work and probably be funny in an episode of Drake and Josh or something (like the sushi episode), but it just drags on and is never really sells it's jokes. It's honestly one of if not the the worst scenes of this entire show- not because it doesn't make sense or anything, it's just not good. The Gorilla Club was pretty awful, but at least the premise for that was nonsense.

   Is that over? Thank god. Meanwhile Robbie attempts to ask Cat to the prom. Or not the prom. It's called something else, and it's supposed to be a combination of cowboy and Hawaiian themed, so it's got some name about that. So Robbie is trying to ask Cat to the prom, but Cat runs away from him. He ends up tracking her down only to tell her that he asked another girl to the dance because Cat kept running away from him. Now she's angry.
   So at the prom Cat is like "heyo Shinjin (the rapist) I am going to fuck you" and Shinjin (the rapist) is like "finally" but hey surprise she's just doing it to get back at Robbie. And Robbie is just genuinely having a good time for once with a girl who appreciates him, but Cat gets RKOed while dancing and asks Robbie to comfort her. He does this by pushing his face against her face in a movement which I have been told is the loving embrace of a kiss and she runs away again.
   Are you concerned about Robbie's date? Well don't be, Sinjin (the rapist) does a sock puppet show for her.

           oh and there's a song and dance at the end but who cares.

      So overall this is a pretty polarizing episode. The A-plot is so bad. But the B-plot is good and fun. Normally I would rate this lower, but a user named "Cabbie_rox2me" commented on the Victorious wiki in 2013 that this was her favorite episode, so I'll have to give it an 8/10.

 

 
Side Notes:

• From this point on Robbie and Cat are mostly characterized as being in a relationship together? It's never really said, but I think that's kind of how they treat it.
• Sinjin (the rapist) gets kind of a happy ending here. This isn't the last appearance of his character, but the episode ends with a girl taking a genuine interest in him and sharing his humor. He hits on Jade later on in the season still, but I like to picture this as his canon ending.
• This is Lane's (the school counselor) last episode. Kind of sad, he was a nice character. Sikowitz is obviously the more prominent "adult" role in the show, but Lane works as kind of the "Responsible adult" that gets brought back when he's needed. His whole lotion thing is never really explained, but I appreciated scenes where he was featured.  He's kind of goofy without having to be loud or 'random' or anything. This isn't nearly a serious (or well written) enough show to warrant any of the characters having to have a serious conversation with an adult about anything, but if it were it's clear Lane would fill that role.

Tori Fixes Beck and Jade

Tori Fixes Beck and Jade

   Well. Not really. In fact she tries to do the exact opposite. But she is there to stand and watch as they fix their own relationship.

  This is one of the few episodes where anything lasting happens, so lets get into it. 

            alright actually just like fuckin hold on here. So Beck goes to Tori and is like "This girl wants to date me" and she's like "Ok so date her" and he's like "No I can't because Jade would be mad" and Tori is like "Ok well I'm a dumbass so lets just pay some guy to ask Jade out that will solve this somehow" and the guy they pay is like "Ok well I'm a dumbass so sorry Jade I'm too scared to ask you out also Tori and Beck did this" and Jade is like "Well I'm angry now" and Beck is like "Shit".

  BUT then Jade is like "Actually I'm not angry you can date whoever you want" and Beck is like "ok?" so he does but his date is a dumbass and she's like "Hey look at me I'm an idiot" and Beck is like "Shit" but now that Beck is dating a girl Jade realizes she actually wants to date him so she does a song and dance and Beck is like "hey sorry do you want to get back into our emotionally abusive relationship?" and Jade is like "Sure but only as long as we don't discuss or even mention the initial problems that led us to break up in the first place" and Beck is like "ok sounds like a deal to me". 

           And then Tori is like "Wow I finally fixed Beck and Jade".

                                                                                      Because she's a dumbass.

thats the plot

  The B-plot is that Robbie is pet-sitting a butterfly that ends up flying into and living in Cat's ear. They can't get it out until they decide to have Andre's grandma yell into Cat's ear, which causes the butterfly to fly through her head and out the other ear. It's good, though a little over the top. Not nearly as good as the tech support B-plot from season 1 when they were far more normal.

                            There's also a little scene where Trina and Andre's Grandma get into a yelling match. It's a fun idea, with the two of them basically representing the "Annoying relative" category going head to head.

I dunno all the swaths of 13 year old girls on the Victorious wiki comment section said they didn't like this episode but I thought it was fine. It's got a good balance of humor and plot and all, it just feels like not a lot happens. The first half of the episode is buildup, and I really can't recall what happens for much of it. 

 I really thought I'd hate Beck going into this show, but Avan Jogia really tries his hardest. He gets probably the worst dialogue out of the cast (presumably because Dan Schneider has no idea what a "cool teen" operates like) but he manages to pull it through. Elizabeth Gilles also wrote the song and dance that's performed at the end. It sounds kind of like a Paramore song from some early EP that didn't take off, but Gilles wrote it when she was like 19, so I'll give her credit.

Overall an 8/10

Side notes:

• 7:43: Must be nice.

Cell Block

Cell Block

   This is a pretty good one. The group is constantly on their phones during Sikowitz's class, so he offers them a challenge to revoke all technology (from after Sikowitz was born) for one week to receive an A for the semester from him. The group agrees, but ends up struggling. Andre has to listen to music on a gramophone, Robbie uses a typewriter instead of a computer, and Cat- doing the worst of all, has to be constantly restrained to stop her from breaking the challenge. 

   After a while the challenge is changed (I can't really remember why, I'm sure there was a reason). Instead of the one week time limit, it's not a boys vs girls competition, with whoever wins receiving the A's. Each group quickly tries to trick/tempt the other into using their phones- but are largely unsuccessful. 

  The group begins to bicker and argue in Sikowitz's class, and he proudly says that everyone can take their phones if they want. But strap in bucko this is a wild ride- it turns out Sikowitz had taken the boys side (stating "Before anything else. I am a boy"), and as the girls activate their phones, the boys leave theirs off, winning the challenge (as Sikowitz never said the challenge was over, simply that people could take their phones). It's a wild twist, and it's very nice to see Tori lose for once. In fact, Tori doesn't do much of anything this episode. It's almost as if she's been a consistent waste of time and writing. Anyway, yeah it's a nice change of pace and it feels fun without being bizarre or crazy.

  I don't even think there's a B-plot in this episode.

     But yeah this is a good one. This to me is more or less how episodes should be in this show. Or should have been. It's not the funniest episode or anything, but it makes sense. It's grounded and it really makes progress through using the characters personalities. Every character gets their own little spot in the episode. The setting of Hollywood Arts isn't used in the same way it was in Season 1. But why would it be? It's not this crazy place to Tori anymore. It's just a school now more or less. 

I'd give it an 8/10

Side Notes:

• At one point Jade says "Have you ever noticed the people at this school really aren't that attractive? It's like this show has been reading my reviews.

Three Girls and a Moose

Three Girls and a Moose

  It really seems like this title should have a joke or a double meaning in it. But it doesn't. The three girls get a crush on a guy named Moose. That's literally it.

   And you know that's basically the plot. Beck says "Hey my friend is visiting from Canada", he shows up, and all three girls fall in love with him. Which is weird, because he's not like the best looking guy. If you saw him in the streets he would look comfortably average, he just has a wide frame. But whatever I guess. So they fall in love with him and all compete in various methods. Cat tries to generally impress him and simply act like his girlfriend, Jade tries to bond over their favorite movie, and Tori, being a monster, simply lies about herself and pretends to be interested in similar things as Moose. 

  In doing so, they neglect the Beck, Robbie, and Andre; who are running some fundraiser for a new school bathroom or something. It's never really made clear what the fundraiser is anyway. Robbie is doing a magic show, Andre is putting on a song and dance maybe, and Beck is.. existing? Not really sure what Beck's role is here. Anyway. Moose rejects all three girls- saying he is only interested in Canadian women. Only after being rejected do the girls decide to be half decent people and deliver on their promise to help their friends, and Tori and Cat do a song and dance for them. At the end of the episode it's revealed that Jade is giving a Moose a ride home which quickly turns into them making out or whatever. Must be nice.

 That's really about the plot of this episode. Normally I would wax on any notable scenes or themes here but there really aren't that many. I can't say this is a bad episode or anything- it's just a bit weird to see 25 minutes of 3 girls doing anything for this guy who hasn't said more than 15 words to them. Like I know it's a high school show and it's fine to do that because "judging a book solely by it's cover" is a pretty common trope in high school shows- but I wish there was some reason for the girls to love this guy. Have him do a pop shuvit as he enters the scene Act 1, I don't give a shit. It's just bizarre for all three of them to blow off their friends for a guy just because he's somewhat wider than average. 

  It's still a decent episode, but it feels like it's missing a lot. There aren't a lot of jokes, there's not a lot of 'drama', it's just kind of 25 minutes of "content". For Victorious, this isn't an awful thing to happen. 

8/10

Opposite Date

Opposite Date

  You know, I used to watch this show just when it was on. I don't know why. Initially I recently gotten cable and just wanted to see what it was- it was a teen show like Zoey 101 or Drake and Josh but just a bit after my time to watch it, but I ended up turning it on whenever I was doing work or similar.  There's something relaxing about it. Because it's not really good. But at the same time it's not bad. It is bad. But it's not as distractedly awful as something like Two Broke Girls. Have you seen that show? Jesus christ. Anyway, Victorious is just white noise. And after a while it just became the thing I would throw on in the background if it was on. Would help me clear my mind. Now I write summaries and reviews. It's very zen. Don't judge me.

  Anyway. I didn't really pay attention to any development over time in the show at the time. But watching now, Season 4 (really starting with The Blonde Squad) is so different than the rest of the show in little minor ways. It's absolutely indistinguishable to anyone who isn't a maniac that has a blog for this, but it's completely different from season 1 in its tone, premise, and design. It makes you wonder if they really had a creative vision for stuff like this. 

 A big component of this change is that at some point it seems that Dan was roused from a 3 year nap and started feverishly trying to write character development and match up cast members for his preteen patrons. This one is about Jade, Tori, and Beck. We're given a pretty sloppy premise for why Tori and Beck are hanging out solo- but whatever. They make plans to hang out just the two of them, but they don't want to make it a date for fear of offending Jade (I suppose, it's never made clear how honest they're being when they say that). They strive to make it an "opposite date" by dressing roughly and getting bad food, but for all intents it seems to be a fairly normal date. Certainly better than the majority of mine.

    

 Near the end of it, Beck receives an (off screen) phone call from his aunt tasking him with taking her dog to the vet to get some medication. Note that it is like 10 PM. They go to the vet and are immediately bombarded with questions from other pet owners on the nature of the relationships between Tori, Beck, and Jade.

  

   Meanwhile, Cat leaks the info of Tori and Beck's date to Jade, and Jade and Cat go off to track the friend-couple down during their date. They confront Tori and Beck in an animal hospital, and Jade confides that she is okay with Tori and Beck hanging out. Because they're friends and she just "gets it" I guess. And that's about it.

   It's not a bad episode, but it feels awkward. The premise is very hastily established, and the ending just feels out of place in this show. All of the vet clients suddenly asking Tori and Beck about the fine details of their relationship isn't quite treated as a joke but it's not quite treated seriously either. It's an inherently silly situation, but it feels like the episode is trying to sell real character based drama during it. Jade comes and essentially gives acceptance to Tori and Beck, but no real ground is made. Tori and Beck are still friends with romantic tension, Beck and Jade are still exes also with romantic tension... for an episode seemingly building up to a big shift in how the characters interact there's very little payoff. Adding to this, Avan Jogia just seems so disinterested during all of it. Beck has absolutely no real input outside of "Well I have good vibes for everyone", and Tori fails to take a stance on if she actually wants to date Beck or not.

 Ultimately it feels like it would better as an episode of Boy Meets World.  Victorious simply doesn't have the infrastructure to support plots like this as characters are constantly battling  the self-contained episode structure the show has used. That being said, the driving scenes between Cat and Jade are good, and Elizabeth Gilles does her best to sell the episode. I'd give it an 8/10

The B-plot is Robbie and Andre being stuck in pear costumes.It reminds me of the B-plot of "A Film by Dale Squires" where Robbie and Andre fix Robbie's car. Like it's fine and you know the characters do well, but it's essentially one joke that spans the entire B-plot. I dunno, it felt a bit lazy to me.

Side Notes:

• In an error, Tori posts a status on the slap but says "Why am I even tweeting this?". The Slap is of course a separate entity in no way related to or parodying twitter, but at this time I think everyone stopped caring and regretted making The Slap a part of the setting. 
• Jade pulls over to make her call to Tori. Nothing really particular happens, I just thought it was a nice touch as a little safety lesson.